Who Was Deni?
The Real Story Behind ‘Dear Deni’ - The intimacy guide about sex, love, dating, flirting, female orgasm, male pleasures, lesbian love, Bisexuality and relationship.
I get asked this a lot, so I want to answer it properly, in one place, instead of piecing it together in an FAQ.
Deni wasn't a character. She wasn't a persona I built, and she definitely wasn't an algorithm with a warm-sounding name. She was a real woman I met online, years ago, while I was looking for erotic stories to feature on my website. I read her work and realized almost immediately that she wasn't inventing any of it. She was writing from experience. That's a different kind of writing. You can tell.
So I asked her a simple question: what if she opened a sex advice column for the site? Neither of us knew what would happen. "Let's see how many emails we get," I told her, half-joking.
We got them. A lot of them. And they never stopped coming for over five years.
What made her different
Deni had no diploma on her wall. She wasn't a therapist, a sexologist, or anyone with letters after her name. What she had instead was something you can't fake: she'd actually lived the questions people were writing about. Desire that had gone quiet in a long relationship. Bodies that didn't behave the way magazines promised. Questions people couldn't ask their partner, let alone their doctor or their mother...
She answered every single one the same way: honestly, warmly, without a flicker of judgment. She called people "honey" and "darling," and she meant it every time. She never talked down to anyone, and she never moralized. She just told the truth, gently, the way only someone who'd made her own mistakes really could.
Then, suddenly, she was gone
I won't pretend that part still doesn't catch me off guard sometimes. Deni passed away suddenly, and the column just stopped. Except it didn't, not really, because the letters kept coming. People still had questions. So eventually, I started answering some of them myself, in her spirit, always clearly marked as mine rather than hers.
Why I turned it into a book
Her answers deserved to outlast an inbox. That's really the whole reason. Dear Deni: Real Letters, Real Answers is the complete archive: her real letters, her real answers, organized so you can read the whole five-year story or jump straight to whatever question is on your mind tonight. There are also seven shorter guides if you'd rather go straight to one topic: flirting, intimacy, pleasure, fantasies, technique, oral sex, or questions around bisexuality and attraction to women.
‘Dear Deni’ is a real woman's answers to real questions, collected the way she would have wanted them kept: honestly.
***
'Dear Deni' Everything you THINK you know about sex by a woman who DOES.
Comments